The Colbert Report/Episodes/EpGuide/Episode 448
Production Info The Check-In * Dr. Colbert is once again interrupted by His Jewish Friend while suffering from a headache. * He's not in the mood. * There was a few tense moments, where His Jewness tried to pressure Stephen into doing the toss. * But, when Stephen went to sleep, Stewart shouted that he would go in the back and do the toss himself. Intro Day Three Market Correction * Dr. Colbert is not panicking, John McCain is on the case ** got flack for saying "the fundamentals of our economy are strong" *** then saying three hours later they are at risk * like a musclman who refuses to wear a condom ** what's the worse thing that could happen? * Obama called Sarah Palin an ugly hog * watch their parents doing it doggy style ** McCain is picking up steam *** rising up from a pile of steaming pile * McCain had no choice to release mudslinging dirty ads ** Obama should have accepted invitations *** Emily Post 101 **** when some one refuses an invitation: obliged to destroy you with brutal and bald faced lies * McCain ** harvest the organs of sleeping toddlers ** inject in his taint with Red Bull ** determines to run a campaign of straight talk and decency Anniversary of 9/11 * Tonight's word: Powerless ** Dana Perino, why Bin Laden is still at large *** President Bush has not been given super powers * America has not given President Bush super powers * lock him in room with: ** radioactive spider ** Fly DNA ** scientist hell-bent on developing super soldier * Extra Sensible Perception ** ability to find a guy in Iraq when he is hiding in Afghanistan * Bush has never been more than a mere mortal chosen by God to defeat America's enemies! McCain's Campaign Slogan * "Country First" ** putting America before our own personal needs ** not alphabetically by bombing Afghanistan, Albania, Abkhazia and Algeria * "Brad" got drunk at a Yankees game and chose to go pee during the singing of God Bless America ** going number one, thereby making America number two * Yankee fans show pride in your by staying put when God Bless America plays ** oversized foam fingers are absorbent Interview * Bob Lutz ** talk about GM's new electric car, which Dr. Colbert hopes electrocutes anyone who tries to steal his gas * corporate mogul * grand mason ** controlling the world economy * came to shill The Volt ** should call it the Chevy Gore * capitulating to the global warmists ** doesn't believe it is man-caused, it is sun-spot activity * will go 40 miles ** but not 40 miles extension cord * lithium ion battery ** not enterprise's anti-matter converter ** or high school potato-battery technology Man Talk * change one's attitude away from burning rubber * will it get you laid ** perhaps, by changing the woman who is attracted, more crunchier * may be able to pimp it * can be charged using the cigarette lighter from a Hummer * gave Dr. Colbert one ** it's very tiny Epilogue * Dr. Colbert was just looking through an old photo album from the 1980's ** he regrets not having the time to put any photos in it * changed his name to Corey so he could hang out with the Brat Pack * terms of the restraining order have expired * "Charlene (I'm Right Behind You)" is now available on Rock Band 2 ** go to the official Colbert Nation webtube, for a peak * Charlene may not be getting enough potassium in her diet ** Dr. Colbert didn't find any banana peals in her garbage Gallery Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Motherload Videos External Tubes *Link Title *Link Title Reviews and Comments